Clearing The Clutter

I have always been the creative type. I seem to always be at my best when I am creating, whether it is creating a new recipe, a new way to do the ordinary, or working in my studio on my latest project. Creativity makes my soul sing. As a kid, I always remember having art, in some form, as part of my life. I was either drawing, painting, doodling, or learning a new craft. I would often turn to my sketch book when I needed to express myself.

I knew as an early age I wanted to study art. As I approached high school graduation, I started to looking at art schools. All I wanted was to be able to study art and follow m aspirations to see where they would lead me. And….enter the clutter. All the adults in my life: parents, counselors, and anyone else that felt compelled to try and influence me discouraged me from attending art school. Every direction I turned I encountered negativity and discouragement. It was a blow to my dreams and aspirations.

And all I heard:

“Do you want to be a starving artist? You could never support yourself with art.”

“You should be more practical.”

“You will never be able to make a living, there are not jobs in art.”

The discouragement lead me to question my dreams, talent, and abilities for something that I truly loved. Eventually planting enough doubt that i regrettably gave in to all the pressures from those around me. I abandoned not only my ambitions of art school but eventually I abandoned my art too. I continued my drawings and paintings for a few of years after high school. Then all the responsibilities of life came in. Trying to meet all the expectations of motherhood, being a wife, and demands of a career got in the way. My art was eventually abandoned completely. I always rationalized it somehow that I was doing this for my family and career.

There were plenty of excuses:

There was not enough time.

My son needed my attention.

It’s too hard with a baby to be able to do my artwork.

As the years went by, the responsibilities of life just seemed to increase the clutter of mind and body. It made at harder and harder to get back to the creativity. It all just seemed to get thicker and thicker. It got to the point where a creative life was just a distant memory. Although a fond memory it was very distant. As life’s journey went on, I had my share of disappointments and troubles just as everyone does. As I approached mid-life I found I had a yearning for something, I didn’t know what it was but there was something always nagging at me. There was something missing, there had to be something more. I just just couldn’t quite put my finger on things.

The clutter has been removed piece by piece, a process that took many years, but I found myself once again. It was a long journey but one that I will be forever grateful. I have found my way back to a creative life. It has been so well worth the journey. I am finally going to art school as I always dreamed and loving every minute of it. Sometimes I am not sure if I would change things or if I would do it the same all over again. If anything, my journeys and experiences had led me to appreciate my creative way of life.

Be deliberate in the clutter you let in your life and never let the clutter of life take away your dreams.

Happy Creating.